If I Ran The Zoo

If I ran the zoo
I'd let the animals free
And replace in the cages
Humans like me
The humans would dance
With knots in their hair
Lions would stop
And watch them and stare
Monkeys would throw
Fruit in the cages
To feed hungry humans
Of all different ages
The babies would cry
As the animals poke
On their fat little tummies
To make them a joke
The old men would yell
At a silly sports game
The one who does tricks
Gains fortune and fame
The elephants pay him
With peanuts and rice
And beer on Sundays
If he plays nice
Behind the glass walls
Where the humans all stay
The animals watch
At night as they prey
On each other
Every one
We don't believe it
But they're having fun
Screaming and yelling
Wrestling on the ground
Men on women
And ecstasy sound
Or maybe its pain
Or anger or love
The animals eat popcorn
And watch from above
If I ran the zoo
I'd let the animals free
They are so much tamer
Than humans like me.